Dale O’Leary’s article “The loss that may not speak its name” notes that children raised by same-gender parents face unique challenges.
A study entitled, My Daddy’s Name in Donor, by Marquardt, Glenn and Clark, found that children conceived by artificial insemination by donor (AID), including those born to lesbian couples, fare worse than those raised by their biological parents on important outcomes such as depression, delinquency and substance abuse.”
Donor conceived children differ from adopted children, Marquardt and colleagues write, in that they “know that the parents raising them are also the ones who intentionally denied them a relationship with at least one of their biological parents. The pain they might feel was caused not by some distant birth parent who gave them up, but by the parent who cares for them every day.” When asked if they worried that their mother would feel angry or hurt if they tried to get more information about or have a relationship with the sperm donor, 44 per cent children conceived by AID for lesbian couples answered “yes”.
Pro-gay researchers Judith Stacey and Timothy Biblarz reviewed the same studies referenced by the APA and found that, contrary to the claims of the gay activists, children of lesbian parents were different; for example, they were more likely to experiment with same-sex relationships than those raised by a father and mother.
An article by Barbara Eisold, "Recreating Mother” gives us insight into the problems created by surrogate mothering for men in same-sex relationships. "Nick" was conceived for a male couple, who hired a nanny to care for the boy. When Nick was two, the couple felt that the nanny had become too emotionally involved with the family, and she was fired. They hired another nanny, who was replaced six months later by a third. By the time Nick was four, he was suffering from profound psychological problems. He wanted to "buy" a mother. The therapist engaged to treat him writes:
How do we explain why this child, the son of a male couple, seemed to need to construct a woman – "Mother" – with whom he could play the role of loving boy/man? How did such an idea enter his mind? What inspired his intensity on the subject?
The answer is tragically obvious: little boys need mothers.
These cases provide anecdotal evidence that children are not as able to adapt to "family diversity" as easily as gay activists claim. Activists can change the laws, they can modify public opinion over time, but they cannot redesign the hearts of children or restructure their fundamental needs.
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